


I Have Secrets I Won't Share

by IamMidnight



Series: Midnight's House of Sin [6]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bullying, Drama, Emails, Feelings Realization, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, It does not happen though, Jealousy, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance is based off someone I know, Lance thinks he is straight for awhile, Loss of Virginity, Loving bully, M/M, Messy, Sex, Shiro is not a uwu cinnamon bun, Some power dynamic fuckery though, Threats of forced outing, all sex is consensual, it does not happen, lol oops, though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2019-11-28 15:51:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18210371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IamMidnight/pseuds/IamMidnight
Summary: Lance discovers Keith's deepest darkest secret.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A few disclaimers especially considering the drama I am seeing on twitter surrounding Sheith specifically as a ship lol.  
> 1\. Shiro and Keith are involved. They are not related in any way in this fic, not even as step or foster brothers. I imagine their ages to be about three years apart so think of Shiro as a senior and Keith and the gang as freshman or maybe sophomores.  
> 2\. Shiro is kind of a dick at times. I like problematic Shiro over innocent never done anything wrong sweetheart Shiro. Think Shiro in his early Kuron stages, between being an innocent cinnamon bun and murderous Galra secret agent.

Lance isn’t really an asshole. He just acts like one sometimes.

Sometimes, perhaps, isn’t the right word for it.

His sometimes is really only around one person. A dark-haired presence in his life for years now that had, somehow, against all odds and fashion sense, maintained a mullet the entire time, from elementary school into high school.

He moves to their little suburb in fourth grade and basically disappears into the background immediately. Sometimes, Lance feels like he is the only one who remembers Keith is there, sitting in the back of the room, staring out the window and up into the sky.

This quiet beginning only lasts until middle school though when a few things happen that launch Keith into the forefront of everyone’s minds. First, he is, somehow, and frustratingly (if you ask Lance) good at everything. Good grades. Great at athletics. He also shoots up in height and somehow his stupid purple eyes get even more purple.

This glow up so to say is combined with what Lance likes to call “the Incident.”

Some boy named James or something says something to Keith in gym class one day. No one even really hears what he says, but Keith transforms from a quiet, non-presence into a raging bull of anger. He punches James and doesn’t stop even when James isn’t fighting back anymore, even as the gym teacher drags him off. Nearly everyone in the grade saw it happen, shocking people who gossip about it for weeks. Keith disappears for a few weeks and then he is back like nothing happened.

Still quiet. Still staring out the window. 

Lance thinks he hates Keith sometimes. Suddenly, he is the coolest guy in school. No one really likes James anyway and now Keith is mysterious, or so the girls call him behind his back. Suddenly, his quiet disinterest becomes part of his thing, his schtick, his persona. He becomes the brooding bad boy who makes As without trying and kicks everyone’s ass at dodgeball.

All of this is only background for the series of events that make Lance Keith’s bully, a cause and effect that Lance blames Keith for, quite irrationally.

Keith is considered “at risk” due to little stuff like skipping class and smoking cigarettes and the like. So, he is enrolled in a buddy system to help “troubled” youths at the high school. Keith gets matched with Shiro and, honestly, Lance knows he should be thankful he doesn’t _need_ a big brother, but if it meant getting to spend time with Shiro maybe it would be worth it. He is the golden child of the high school, popular, hot, athletic, but above all else, genuinely kind.

This big brother arrangement isn’t broadcast to the school, of course. Lance knows because Shiro is friends with Matt, Pidge’s older brother. The “situation” is explained to them and Pidge is encouraged to befriend Keith into their friend group. Keith doesn’t really have friends and apparently friends are necessary for healthy social development in teenagers, or so Pidge tells him.   

In a blink of an eye, they adopt Keith like a stray cat and suddenly there is a fourth presence in their little group of three. Pidge bonds with him somehow and Lance frowns whenever he sees her texting with him like crazy. Hunk even manages to befriend the quiet, brooding boy, but Lance supposes no one can resist being bribed with Hunk’s cookies on the reg.

And Lance supposes he is friends with Keith too. They sit at lunch together and occasionally make brief small talk. Keith actually isn’t as bad as Lance once thought. The bad boy brooding, on closer examination, is closer to social awkwardness. It isn’t that he isn’t good with people. It is more like he literally hasn’t had experience with people so he doesn’t know how to act around them. Lance assumes, maybe perceives that Keith hasn’t had the best of lives too, causing the quick temper and tendency to isolate himself.

He is actually pretty funny though. Blunt to a fault. Misses social cues sometimes. Not a bad guy, all things considered.  

All of this would be fine. Like Lance said, he is not an asshole and it is fine that Keith brings their trio to four. He can manage his jealousy that Keith is somehow the cool kid at school despite the fact that he can barely make it through one conversation without committing some kind of social faux pas.

But, then a bomb is dropped on Lance that really forces his hand.

It is a complete accident and Lance has zero intention of eavesdropping when he walks into the library one day, barely waving at an upset Keith storming out. Lance shrugs. Keith gets cranky sometimes and it is nothing new. So, he sits at his favorite library computer, the one in the back corner, and sees Keith’s account logged in.  He snickers and goes to see if his twitter or Instagram is open so he can post something stupid about how Keith got hacked when, instead, he sees an email exchange.

Keith’s email, RedBlade23, is talking to someone called TakashiShiroGains, who Lance recognizes as Shiro, god of high school and Keith’s mentor.

And really, Lance doesn’t care what they are talking about. He doesn’t.

But a sentence pops out to him. He stares at it. He rereads it over and over again. He re-checks the email addresses. He re-reads it again. His mind explodes.

TakashiShiroGains: Keith, I am sorry you feel like I used you for sex. I care about you a lot

Lance has to be misunderstanding something because there is NO WAY that that sentence can be implying what he thinks. That, not only is Keith apparently not straight, but that he is also having or had sex with fucking SHIRO.

Lance can’t comprehend it. He can’t. Keith is really straight, right down to his bad fashion sense and bad hair and bad personality. Now, Lance isn’t one to stereotype others. He doesn’t think all gays are glitter wearing or girly, of course. But Keith has still always come off as very, very straight to Lance. Or maybe asexual, if he is being honest. He cannot picture, for the life of him, Keith being in a relationship with someone, romantically or sexually.  

But, beyond this bombshell, Lance cannot imagine Shiro and Keith fucking. Like, maybe he could have accepted it if it wasn’t Shiro or if it was someone their age. But Shiro??

So, what is Lance supposed to do? Not read more? Whatever.

He scrolls to the top of the email thread and settles in, history homework forgotten.

He quickly learns a few facts that help clarify the matter, but still leave Lance confused and wondering if he is reading some weird RPG rather than actual things that happened with Keith and Shiro.

Apparently, Keith is gay. He comes out to Shiro over email. Shiro, who has been openly gay since middle school, sends him a nice email back, encouraging him and comforting him and praising him.

Keith is in the closet though and apparently Shiro is the only one who knows.

Gay.

Keith Kogane is gay.

GAY GAY GAY.

Lance scrolls down more, unable to stop himself. There are emails about Keith struggling with his emotions and Shiro patiently walking him through strategies for dealing with them. They send memes back and forth sometimes.

But, Lance is mostly interested in the good stuff that occurs later in the email thread.

It is over Christmas break where things get good.

TakashiShiroGains: First, I want to say that I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at myself. I wish you would have stayed earlier so we could have talked more. What happened last week…it can’t happen again. It shouldn’t have happened.

RedBlade23: So you regret being with me?

TakashiShiroGains: No…don’t word it that way. I don’t regret anything about you. I am a lot older though and I am supposed to be your mentor and it just shouldn’t have happened.

RedBlade23: Age ain’t nothing but a number

TakashiShiroGains: You were a virgin. You should have given your virginity to someone you love and trust, someone you are in love with.

There is a suspiciously long gap of time before Keith responds, one that makes Lance cringe.  

RedBlade23: It’s not a big deal, Shiro. Virginity is just a concept anyway.

TakashiShiroGains: I don’t want this to ruin our friendship. I value you as a friend.

RedBlade23: It doesn’t have to ruin anything. You’re right.

Lance’s mind is blown, again. They had fucked. Were fucking. Despite Shiro’s insistence that it not happen again, it is clear that it had happened again and again and again.  

Shiro had not only tapped that ass, but he had popped Keith’s cherry. Keith had let him inside his asshole. He had laid on a bed or couch or something and let Shiro hump into him until he came. Then they had done it again and again and again and again.  

Lance wonders if they used condoms. If Shiro came inside him. If Keith ever sucked his dick.

Lance’s hands are shaking as he scrolls more.

It is also very clear that Keith is more into Shiro than Shiro is into Keith. Lance sees the word “friend” frequently in Shiro’s emails, but Keith attempts to flirt awkwardly, giving new context to the way he follows Shiro around like a little puppy in real life.

 _Oof_ , Keith, Lance thinks.

Then, he gets to the most recent emails and everything becomes clearer.

RedBlade23: You are just an asshole like all of them. Fuck off, shiro

TakashiShiroGains: Keith, I am sorry you feel like I used you for sex. I care about you a lot.

RedBlade23: Great non-apology. Stop emailing me. Why don’t you go email your boyfriend?

TakashiShiroGains: Please, can we talk about this in person? I understand that you’re hurt and I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just don’t feel that way about you. I’m sorry.

RedBlade23: Great. Its whatever. Glad you took what you wanted and then ditched me when you found someone else to fuck. Have a nice life, asshole.

The last email had just been sent, probably right before Keith stormed past Lance.

Lance sits back and takes a deep breath. Keith, the great Keith Kogane, was a big fat gaybo. Not only was he gay, but he was fucking Shiro on the downlow for months now. He is also in love with Shiro who clearly used him as a side piece.  

Lance feels delirious.

These are the events that bring poor Keith into his orbit. The accidental eavesdropping that hands him the ammunition to finally get a leg up on Keith. The secret that gives him all the power in the world.  


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth is revealed, sort of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updated tags-please read

Whatever weird energy Lance felt toward Keith before magnifies times 10 now that he knows Keith’s dirty little secret. He discovers the emails on a Friday. What follows is the worst, no, only terrible three- day weekend he has ever endured in his lifetime. Every fiber of his being wants to see Keith again, as if seeing him will somehow confirm the truth.

The world seems out to get him though as Keith does not show up for home room. Then, the class they would have together before lunch is ruined when his teacher pulls Lance out of the classroom to make up a test in the teacher’s lounge.

Lance thinks he might literally die if he does not see Keith at lunch. He fears Keith is absent and practically runs to their table to confirm. He sees Pidge first, then Hunk…then a mop of dark hair and sighs in relief.

He throws himself down in his seat, anxiously saying hi, but mostly looking at the source of his current stress.  

Keith is just Keith though. Same old clothing. Same hair. Lance can tell he is obviously upset though. He is picking at his lunch, eyes downcast, paler than usual. It isn’t the first time they had seen him like that.  

However, it is the first time that Lance knows why, exactly, Keith is acting withdrawn and moody. It makes him giddy with excitement.

While Hunk and Pidge share concerned glances and carefully navigate how to help Keith. There is an art to this. You can’t approach too strongly. Rather, let Keith come to you. Watching this process only excites Lance more though. Hunk and Pidge are in the dark, assuming Keith is just depressed or something. Only he knew the truth. Only he knew what Keith had been doing in his spare time, spreading his legs for the captain of the football team.

While Hunk and Pidge make careful conversation, Lance examines Keith. It is like he is seeing him for the first time. Suddenly, how he sits in his chair or how he fiddles with his stupid fingerless gloves seems gay to Lance now. How could they all have missed something that seems so obvious now?

Lance is also struck for the first time by what a pretty guy Keith is. Long eyelashes. Surprisingly delicate features despite not being particularly delicate in any other way. He isn’t girly at all, but he is undeniably pretty, even with the muscles and heavy brows and sharp chin. Lance can see why Shiro would be interested in Keith.  

He imagines Shiro pinning Keith underneath him. He wonders what faces and noises he would make.

And, of course, who wouldn’t want to fuck Shiro? He is one of the few people Lance had met who seems to transcend sexuality. Everyone is a little into Shiro, even if they typically aren’t interested in men. Lance is sympathetic to Keith. Hell, Lance is straight and still might fall for Shiro if Shiro had hit on him with those dark grey eyes and Adonis-like body.

He stops staring when Keith briskly tells them that nothing is wrong, shutting down the carefully laid opportunities to talk that Hunk and Pidge lay out for him. Lance knows better.

Lance knows he is heart-broken.

When Keith’s dark eyes meet his, Lance can’t help but smirk at him.  

They continue their lunch, eventually pulling out homework to work on during the rest of the period. 

“This sucks,” Keith mumbles, scratching through some weird geometry formula.

“You would know something about that, wouldn’t you?” Lance answers, the words slipping from his mouth before he can even realize what is happening.

Keith looks up sharply and then rolls his eyes.

I mean, it isn’t like they haven’t picked at each other before.

They work in silence for a few more minutes before Keith stretches, happening to catch Lance’s eye from across the table.

Lance sticks his thumb into his cheek and presses it back and forth, mimicking a blow job.

Keith glares at him again, equal parts confused and angry this time.  

Lance knows good and well that he should back off, but it is like some impulse control had been severed. Why should he hold his tongue when he knows now that Keith loves dick?  

Pidge, unknowingly, serves Keith up to him on a platter.

“Did you guys know that there is a penguin called the fairy penguin?” she asks, flipping through a journal article.  

“I bet Keith knows, you know, fairies and all…” he spits the word fairies out.

This one finally earns him a confused look from Pidge, but before anything can be said Keith grabs his arm, dragging him outside the lunchroom into a hallway.

“What are you doing?” he hisses.

“Gay,” Lance responds.

“Excuse me?”

“Gay. Big, fat gay.”

“I’m...what?”

“You. Suck. Dick. And like it.”

Keith pushes him against a wall, a familiar angry look on his face, washing away the kicked puppy look that he has been wearing all lunch. “Want to say that again?”

“Are you denying it? Come on, man. The truth will set you free. I know you’re gay.”

Keith’s eyes dart around and he seems to be calculating his next step. He finally deflates, letting go of Lance’s shirt. 

“How did you know?”

Of course, Lance can’t really tell him.

“Its pretty obvious.”

“It is?” Keith eyes widen. He swallows hard and looks around, paranoid. “You can’t tell anyone.”

“Why don’t you just come out? Shiro is out.”

Keith visibly winces at the mention of Shiro. “Because…it’s complicated. I’m just not ready. Don’t tell anyone?”

Lance smirks. “Suck my dick and maybe I won’t tell anyone.”

Keith looks visibly shocked. “Excuse me? Fuck off.”

“Don’t act like you don’t want it.”

Keith stares at him carefully, more confused than offended now. 

“Are you…not straight?”

Lance laughs loudly. “Nope. I’m no ass bandit. But I mean, a mouth is a mouth.”

Keith backs up, a strange look on his face, disgusted, but with a faraway look that doesn’t seem directed at Lance at all.

Lance knows he’s being gross though so he throws Keith a bone.

“Oh come on, man, I’m just kidding. I won’t tell anyone. It’s no biggie.” And its not really a big deal, except for how Lance feels like his entire life is forever changed now.  

Keith relaxes and nods. “Thanks Lance,” he responds, crossing his arms tightly across his chest.   

They walk slowly back to the lunchroom, Lance doing nothing to stop his racing mind.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance is ignorant, Shiro appears, and Keith hates his life right now (but he won't always) 
> 
> (Also, important note-added tags and I edited chapter two read the beginning note for details!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I edited chapter two a bit because I feel like I made Lance a lot rapier than I meant to. He is not going to blackmail Keith with outing him to get sex and I feel like I made it sound that way. Now, Lance is not being edited to be a great guy-he is still a dick, just not a rapist dick in this fic. I have also added some tags. 
> 
> I have also started a new twitter that is completely empty LOL. I made a new one because I have irl friends and family on my main who I don't want to know about my fics. I plan on updating about my fics there and also possible brainstorming with people since summer is coming up and I will have more time to write write write. I have so many ideas it is torture that I am so busy with school. Anyway, let me follow you so my twitter isn't empty!
> 
>  <https://twitter.com/MidNigh29712110>

For better or worse, Lance and Keith now have a bond. Lance isn’t claiming it’s always a positive one, but he understands so much more about Keith now, more than the people who seem even closer to him, like Pidge. The way he followed Shiro around like a puppy dog. His occasional moments of giddiness followed by depression. The way he always seemed a little uncomfortable in his own skin.

He also knows what happened between him and Shiro, something Keith carefully hides from others even when it becomes painfully obvious that something did, in fact, happen. They go from attached at the hip to avoiding each other. Or, rather, Keith avoiding Shiro.

Lance assumes that Shiro tries to keep the situation private at least for a week or so. Then his resolve cracks.

Shiro approaches their lunch table one day, a concerned look on his face that even Lance finds a little obnoxious. If he cared that much, then he probably wouldn’t have fucked around with Keith, literally or figuratively.

“Hi guys. Keith, can we speak privately?” he asks, one hand on the back of Keith’s chair.

Lance watches as Keith stiffens, a panicked look on his face that quickly morphs back into Keith’s stone cold unmoved glare.

“I just remembered I have to meet a teacher…over there. Another time?” he says, quickly jumping to his feet. He leaves the table quickly, Shiro trailing behind him. Lance watches in satisfaction as Shiro quickly loses Keith in the crowd of the cafeteria. Keith is faster than you would expect for someone his size.  

Shiro makes a few attempts to approach Keith over the next week or two and Keith gives stilted reasons to escape. One time, he sees Shiro walking toward their lunch table and literally gets up and stalks off, not even waiting to give the excuse.

Hunk and Pidge create a special group chat to discuss what happened, not in a gossipy way, but rather in a “Is Keith having a crisis and do we need to help” way. Apparently, not even Matt knows what happened, though Lance wonders if he does and is just keeping it from Pidge since Keith isn’t out yet. That, or if Lance thinks about it, Shiro is borderline old enough that fucking Keith could be a statutory rape charge, not that Keith would ever tattle on him. He doesn’t blame Shiro for wanting to keep everything a secret.

It amazes Lance that it isn’t obvious to others exactly what happened though. Keith isn’t exactly being subtle when he stutters and blushes his way out of a conversation with a somber looking Shiro every other day. But, Hunk and Pidge come up with other theories, from Keith relapsing into old ways to him being upset that Shiro would be gone soon since he is graduating and going to college. They even create some bizarre theory about Keith and Shiro having a fight about money for some reason.   

Of course, Lance can’t fault them too much. He has insider knowledge. Without it, he might be coming up with the same conspiracy theories. He imagines it is difficult for anyone to know cool, aloof Keith and then make the leap to him being this upset over a boy. It is bizarrely out of character for him and Lance knows Keith needs a friend, a confidante right now more than anything else.  

Which, Lance wants to be that for Keith. He truly does. It just doesn’t stop the mean streak that seems to be born out of nowhere in Lance though. He can’t stop himself from amping up whatever weird little rivalry they had pre-emails. He can’t stop himself from making fun of Keith’s clothes and his hair and whatever else comes to mind.

It is cruel and Lance knows it. Keith is sad and in the closet. His friend count shrank from 5 to 3 seemingly overnight (Matt is a casualty too since he is such close friends with Shiro). He needs support and kindness, not Lance throwing little balls of paper at the back of his head throughout every class they have together.

Not having his clothes made fun of, but seriously who wears a crop jacket.

Not having him wink and leer at him every time something even remotely interpreted as gay comes up, like when a teacher describes a cell structure as having a top and bottom.

What surprises Lance is Keith taking it. He fights back a little, but mostly he just ignores Lance or glares at him, an air of resignation wafting from him.

They are in art class when Lance, perhaps, takes things too far. They are designing posters or some bullshit when he is inspired by a little pot of rainbow glitter sitting in the supplies. With a barely suppressed grin, he shows it to Keith and then dumps some of it over Keith’s head. Keith stands there for about 10 seconds, mouth dropped open, and, for a second, Lance thinks he really fucked up and is about to get hit. But, Keith turns and storms out of the room, not coming back for the rest of the period.

Hunk frowns, stopping his recreation of the Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs cover. “That wasn’t cool,” he says, voice disappointed and angry.  

“I just thought it would be funny,” Lance defends himself.

“It wasn’t funny and Keith doesn’t need your shit right now,” Hunk responds.

Lance awkwardly shifts on his feet and then concedes. “You’re right. I’ll apologize.”

I mean, glitter is an asshole move. Keith would be getting that out of his mullet for the next month if Lance’s nieces experiments with glitter are any indication of its staying power. Lance prepares himself to apologize and assumes everything will go back to normal.

Except it doesn’t. Keith stops showing up to lunch and clearly avoids Lance even when they have the same class.  

Lance has a queasy feeling in his stomach like maybe he **had** taken things too far. He tells himself that maybe Keith is just avoiding Shiro still, which he totally is, but Lance knows that he can’t entirely blame Shiro for this.

Pidge and Hunk say that Keith texted them and explained that he is being tutored during lunch now, which they all know is a lie. His two kinder friends are one step away from staging an intervention, but Lance knows what he needs to do.

So he looks for Keith, everywhere that a student could be on school grounds.

He finally finds Keith eating by himself in a corner of the library. He looks angry, eyebrows knit, jaw set, the same face that once had scared Lance before he knew the truth.

“Hi Keithy,” Lance says, bouncing down into a chair next to Keith.

Keith looks at him warily.

“No hi for your friend?”

“You aren’t my friend.”

And now, that hurt. Lance may be acting like an asshole, but they had history together now.

“I’m sorry,” he responds automatically. “I went too far.”

Keith stares at him before sighing. “Lance, do you have a problem with me being gay?”

“No! I am no homophobe. I supported Bernie! I’ve been to Pride as an ally!”

Keith stares at him. “Why are you being such a dick then?”

Lance takes a deep breath.

“Don’t you DARE make a joke about dicks right now,” Keith warns.

The real answer is that he isn’t sure why he is being such a dick. He just knows he wants to pull Keith’s hair and also when he doesn’t come to lunch the room feels empty now. Lance exhales. “Just come back to the table, ok? I was just teasing. We are buddies now, right?”

“Is that how you think buddies act?”

“Don’t friends tease each other?”

Keith actually seems to consider this, looking at Lance carefully.

“You’ve treated me different ever since you realized what I am.”

“Well, I’ve never had a gay friend before.”

“Just treat me normally and stop being an ignorant fuck.”  

“Ok. Educate me then.”

“I’m not like, the voice of gay people.”

“Can’t I ask some questions?”

Keith takes a deep breath, eyes shifting around. He seems uncomfortable and Lance desperately wants to break tension.

“So like, are you going to start talking with a lisp?”

“What the fuck, Lance.”

“I read on reddit that it’s totally a thing.”

“Please don’t ever cite reddit as a source again and no, that’s…that’s a stupid stereotype.”

“But sometimes stereotypes are true? Anyway, top or bottom?”

“Uhm…”

“You can’t tell me you guys don’t have tops and bottoms I see it all over twitter.”

“It’s complicated…I don’t know.”

“Ug, Keith, you suck at answering questions. Why am I friends with the lamest homo? Fine…Do you actually suck dick?” He blurts out.

Keith’s eyes widen and he looks around before quietly nodding. Lance takes a moment, just one quick moment, to think about Keith struggling to take down what Lance assumes is Shiro’s massive package. Everyone has seen his bulge in his track shorts. Everyone.  

Lance wrinkles his nose when he actually thinks about it though. “Isn’t that gross?”

“No?”

“Has someone sucked your dick?”

Keith nods again and Lance screams on the inside at the thought.

“I don’t know dude,” Lance continues. “Dicks are pretty gross. Don’t they taste like dick? But I guess people like you love that taste…”

“Uh…well, yeah, but…you’re making it weird. Don’t you go down on girls you have sex with? A dick isn’t grosser than what girls have.”

“I don’t.”

“What, really?”

“It’s never come up?”

Keith snorts.

“What?”

“You suck in bed.”

“What? Fuck you, no I don’t.”

“Do the girls you sleep with even come?”

Lance sputters, suddenly angry that Keith is acting like he is the sexually knowledgeable one. “Shut up. It’s easier for guys anyway. You can just look at a guy and get him off. Girls are like, mysteries.”

Keith smiles, for real, and things almost feel normal between them again.

“Besides, guys in general are totally grosser than girls. That is objective, my dude.”

Keith shakes his head. “There is nothing gross about hi…guys. Some guys.”

“What did you start to say?”

“Nothing.”

As if summoned, a large form appears at the end of the row of books and then makes its way to their table.

Shiro.

Lance feels Keith immediately tense and shut down. Unfortunately, the little table was not a good choice. Its place in a small recess means it is hidden fairly well, but it also leaves few avenues for quick escape, especially with Shiro’s broad shoulders in the way.

He puts a hand on Keith’s shoulder and Lance is pulled in 80 different directions at once. He notes how Keith is shutting down, eyes blank and arms crossed over his chest like he is cradling himself. He also can’t help but look at Shiro in a new light too, Shiro who apparently sucked Keith’s dick and vice versa. He can’t stop himself from imagining it, Shiro’s mouth, Keith’s whimpers (he is convinced Keith is loud), the spit and the sweat and the sinfulness of it all. Finally, he feels a touch of strange possession. Shiro had relinquished his right to touch Keith so casually. Those are the rules when you dump someone you have been using for sex.

“Lance,” Shiro speaks, a friendly smile on his lips, the same lips that had been wrapped around Keith’s cock at some point. “I need to have a chat with Keith. Can you give us some privacy?”

Lance looks at his friendly grey eyes and then his eyes trail downward, from Shiro’s grip on Keith’s shoulder to Keith’s resignation.

“Actually, Keith and I are busy preparing for a test next period. Sorry Shiro.” Lance says it without thinking.

Keith looks up at him, eyes widening. “Uh yeah. A test. We need to study.”

Shiro surveys the table where not a single book or note exists, just Keith’s half-eaten sandwich. Lance can tell he is absolutely dying to force him to leave, that he is dying to call Keith out.

But, he can’t do that, not really, and he likely has no idea that Lance knows everything, from Keith’s sexuality to all the dirty details about his activities.

Shiro seems at a loss for words and Lance feels bad for a split second. He is a nice guy, though Lance supposes he can’t really be that nice of a guy based on what he knows now. Or maybe that is unfair. I mean, if you are a gay guy how do you not nail Keith if given the chance?

Lance leans over, placing a hand on Keith’s forearm and smiles as charmingly as he can muster at Shiro. “You understand right? Gotta keep them grades up.”

“It will just take a few minutes,” Shiro continues, stubbornly.

“Maybe another time,” Keith mutters.

“Classes come first,” Lance flashes a grin up at him, maintaining his hold on Keith’s arm.   

Shiro shakes his head slightly and then gives in. “Yes. Keith, please…just contact me soon, ok?” He pleads.

Then he is leaving and a feeling close to victory swells in Lance’s chest, both from the retreating form of Shiro and the look of gratitude Keith gives him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is turning out to be a bit too close to reality. Like, god, people have actually said this shit to me before.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance is a disaster, Keith is starting to realize this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What am I doing with my life...

“Oooooooooh Lance. You make me so wet.”

Keith squirms, biting his cherry red lower lip and rubbing a hand across Lance’s chest.

“I need it. I need your big, fat cock,” Keith moans, looking at him with lust and desperation.

Lance can barely believe his luck, trying to contain himself as Keith gyrates while on top of him. Keith lowers his head to Lance’s chest and licks. His sinful tongue drags across Lance’s skin, setting Lance on fire with desire.

With eyes full of lust, Keith looks up at Lance, dragging his tongue lower and lower to Lance’s stomach and then even lower.

Lance holds his breath, unable to look away from the sultry twisting body of Keith, the heavy eyes, the red plump lips, the hungry way he moves down Lance’s body and moans his name.

Then, his hand reaches downward, even further, finally touching Lance where he needs it the most. A surprisingly soft hand wraps around his cock. Keith giggles, biting his lower lip again before his mouth drops open, tongue hanging out as he leans down and…

“Lance! You need to get up! You’ll be late for school!”

Lance loves his mother, he really does. But right now, he would give anything to take back her walking into his room and waking him up at this very moment.

He doesn’t even have time to rub one out before he is being rushed through his morning routine and a Kind bar is shoved at him as he leaves the house. He _is_ late so he rushes to school as quickly as possible, shoving down the breakfast bar with a brain barely working.

It doesn’t hit him until first period that something is off.

That maybe having a sex dream about Keith is kinda weird.

Maybe kinda wrong.

Maybe kinda gay. 

Which isn’t right. Lance is exclusively attracted to women.

His anxiety grows exponentially once the thought hits him. He checks out, mentally, of his government class and briefly considers texting Hunk or Pidge for advice. He can’t though. He knows they would make assumptions. So, he does the next best thing and googles it. One of the first results is a GQ article that claims you can have sex with men and still be straight, especially if there is no mutual genital touching.

Lance is immediately reassured. See, even in his dream he was just passive. Just receiving Keith’s gayness rather than being gay himself. It isn’t like he would ever touch Keith’s dick or anything.

 _As long as our balls don’t touch, it isn’t gay,_ Lance thinks.

He finds a few other articles that discuss how men are hard-coded biologically to seek sex and sexual pleasure and that that can take many forms. That men are alphas who are programmed to want sex and to pursue it and sometimes men with very high libidos aren’t necessarily choosy. They will go for sexually available and, like it or not, Keith had made himself sexually available by being gay. That doesn’t make _Lance_ gay.  

Lance nods. He is just a horny dude who would let pretty much anyone suck his dick. It is really Keith’s fault anyway.

It isn’t Lance’s fault that he was forced to imagine Keith fucking Shiro. Who wouldn’t in his shoes? Keith himself admitted he sucked dick before. Who could blame Lance for being curious? Horny and curious?

No one reasonable, that’s who.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Nevertheless, he feels strange around Keith after the dream. Like he doesn’t know quite how to hold his body. Keith is clueless though and makes small talk like nothing happened about a project in Biology that Lance isn’t starting for at least another week. The four of them are all sitting in one of the classrooms, packing up for the day. Keith actually seems a bit better today, less tired, less jumpy. Shiro had backed off a bit, perhaps leading to the change. Lance had also cooled his teasing as well, especially since Hunk and Pidge were taking notice of it. The urge is always present though, with every flick of Keith’s mullet or word that falls out of his mouth.

Keith leans backward at one point and stretches, still talking about microbes. His shirt rides up and Lance looks at the pale skin that is exposed. Keith licks his lips as he stretches and Lance tracks the movement.   

As they are leaving, Pidge and Hunk step outside first, talking about their AP bio project which sounds a hundred times harder than what Keith and him have to do in regular bio.

Keith pulls his backpack on, accidentally sending a pen flying to the ground. He bends over to pick it up and, really, this is such a normal moment. No big deal. A friend picking up a dropped pen. It has probably happened near Lance a million times.  

But all Lance can see is that ass.

Keith’s shockingly round, perfect ass, presented to him as Keith bends at the waist to pick the pen up. It practically sways in front of him and Lance angrily clenches a fist. Keith has to be doing this on purpose. No one picks up a pen like that. No one stretches and shows off their stomach that seductively. No one licks their lips that much.  

Without thinking, he reaches out and pinches one of those firm cheeks.

The moment is broken instantly as the air goes icy and Keith freezes.

In slow motion, he turns, eyes wide, still half hunched over with the pen in hand. He looks at Lance’s hand, still awkwardly outstretched though no longer touching Keith’s ass.

“Did you just…did you just grab my ass?”

Lance panics momentarily and then remembers who he is. Why would he let Keith throw him off? Keith is the awkward closet case, not him.  

So he spanks Keith’s ass next, almost laughing at the cartoonish outraged expression on the other boy’s face.

“Don’t make it weird, pretty boy,” he says, smirking at Keith and then sauntering out like nothing had happened.

Afterall, it isn’t his fault that Keith has a great ass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so short. When I combined it with the next scene it felt too long.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance sees something he wishes he didn't and then gets Keith in a great position.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why is this dumbass Lance so fun to write. Anyway, next chap we go from 0-100

“Hey Lance, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Nothing at all. Why would you think something is wrong.”

“Well…” Hunk points. “You are currently holding your water bottle so tight it might break.”

“No, I’m not.”

“And you have been glaring at nothing for the last 20 minutes,” Pidge adds.

“I didn’t sleep well. It’s fine. I’m fine.”

Everything was not fine.

Lance had a good morning, woke up on time, even got to school early ready to do some homework he had blown off the night before. Then, as he is walking to the side door to get to his homeroom, he sees it, nestled halfway behind the building where there are a few small trees and bushes. The reason for his bad mood.

Shiro and Keith.

Keith is leaning with his back against the wall, looking up at Shiro. Shiro is leaning over him, one arm leaning on the wall beside Keith’s head.

They aren’t quite kissing, but it is way too intimate.

Lance is fuming. He wishes he could get close enough to eavesdrop, but there really isn’t a good hiding spot for doing so and they are so close he would basically have to be inches from them to hear whatever Shiro is saying to Keith right now. He watches for a moment, grinding his teeth as he sees the gentle look on Keith’s face as he looks up at Shiro.

Then Shiro is backing away and Lance leaves, hoping that they didn’t see him staring.

If he is being honest with himself, Lance has to admit that he is a bit obsessed with Keith right now. His cherry red lips. His expressive eyes. How bizarrely soft his skin is.

He wonders what it would feel like to bend him over like Shiro had. To feel those lips wrapped around his cock. He wonders if Keith is loud.

He had, like everyone at school, seen Shiro playing football or during PE, where he always wore tight shirts and even more form-fitting athletic tights. Shiro is undoubtedly physically attractive. Muscular. Huge. A great smile. He had somehow missed the gawky teenage years completely and entered his peak years even as a teenager.

Lance _hates_ him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lance is relieved at Keith’s behavior over the next few days though. Keith seems happier, but not as happy as he thinks he would be if Shiro wanted to date him or if they were boyfriends. He is 90% sure they are not dating.

He is mildly worried that Keith agreed to go back to their old agreement of Shiro getting Keith’s ass for free, not even paying the respect of giving Keith a title like boyfriend. He thinks Keith is a moron if he got back into a fuck buddies relationship with Shiro, but its none of Lance’s business, he tells himself.  

It is a rare Saturday where he gets more Keith time though. They all have to pile into a car to go to a museum for a class. There are too many of them though especially considering just how many people have to go. Hunk, Pidge, Matt, Keith, Lance, Allura, and Ryan all need to cram into a small car. Hunk has to drive, being the only one they all trust to get them there alive. Pidge, embarrassingly, allows herself to sit on Matt’s lap. Ryan and Allura scramble into the two remaining spots and smirk back at Lance and Keith.  

Lance quickly plops down, looking up smugly at Keith.

“Get up,” Keith hisses.

“No.”

“I’m not sitting in your lap, Lance. You sit in mine.”

“Snooze you lose.”

“Lance!”

“Really guys? Let the toxic masculinity go and suck it up. Do you think I want to be in my brother’s lap right now?” Pidge sneers from the front seat.

Keith huffs, but eventually gives in, sitting gingerly on the edge of Lance’s lap.

Lance’s heart is racing as the car pulls out of the driveway. He is ridiculously aware of just how close Keith is, the feeling of his weight on his lap.

Lance leans forward when everyone seems preoccupied with talking about a game plan for the museum. Keith’s hair smells surprisingly like vanilla. It is also softer than he expects when it tickles against his face.

And god, that ass. Keith’s ass is round and firm and perfect against his crotch. Lance can’t help but loop an arm around Keith’s waist, pulling him back ever so gently.

“Lance,” Keith hisses back.

“It’s fine,” Lance whispers back. He is surprised by how natural this feels. Both of them are tall and muscular so he doesn’t think they would fit together, not like how girls do. Girls are small and soft and seem made to fit into the curve of Lance’s chest and arms. Keith is basically his size, no, even bigger, yet somehow it feels natural to pull him backwards more firmly into his lap.

It would be better if Keith weren’t so tense though.

“You know what you are, don’t you like this stuff?” Lance says quietly.

“I do. I do like this type of stuff. But, more importantly, do _you_ like this type of stuff?”

“Not everyone is gay. I know gay people want everyone to be gay, but they aren’t,” Lance answers confidently before raising his knee slightly, unsettling Keith and forcing his legs apart a bit.

Keith reaches down and grabs his knee, so hard that it is painful.   

“Don’t act like you aren’t a bottom bitch,” Lance whispers back, as lowly as he can.

Keith immediately twists, punching Lance in the arm hard enough to bruise it.  

Lance only laughs, gripping him tighter.

“You two are like grade schoolers,” Hunk says, glaring at them in the rearview mirror.

With Keith twisting around on his lap, could you blame Lance for enjoying himself though? When the car returns to discussion of the museum, he pulls Keith close, sighing against his back. 

He makes a mistake though when he starts thinking about what it would be like if Keith were naked. If this were a different situation. If Keith weren’t so tense and rather twisted around in his lap for a different reason than discomfort.

He feels himself growing hard. Keith shifts awkwardly, looking back at Lance with wide eyes.

Lance just shrugs.

It’s just friction after all and he is a teenage boy. He can’t be blamed for what basically amounts to a reflex, a biological response he has no control over.

When they arrive at the museum, everyone files out, Keith darting off his lap quickly and carefully not making eye contact with him. He stalks away from the pack, carefully turning his back to all of them.

Lance follows him, never quite letting Keith get away from him because, let’s be honest, Keith is more interesting than anything in this museum. He even ducks Hunk to slink behind Keith more effectively.

Keith stops in front what looks like a picture by some artist named Clecio Lira, allowing Lance to step beside him.

There is any number of things that could be said between them. About the photograph, about its meaning, about the museum, about this exhibit, about what just happened between them, about why Keith is still not making eye contact with him. What comes out instead is,

“So, want to talk about Shiro?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW hunk and pidge don't entirely see what is happening between them. like, they don't see how much of a dick Lance is being and would say something if they did.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapter that has Lance questioning if their balls touched or not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so both Keith and Lance are a little drunk in this chapter but not like, falling down non-con drunk. Just wanted to clear that up.

“Shiro? Shiro…who…oh that Shiro? Takashi Shirogane? I don’t know what you mean. What happened with Shiro?”

Lance cringes for Keith.

“Do we know anyone else named Shiro? And, you don’t have to play dumb.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“You two fucked!” Lance hisses, jabbing a finger at Keith’s arm.

Keith literally gasps. “I…I didn’t…”

“It’s obvious.”

Keith swallows hard. “It is? How?”

“The way you act around him. We all know something happened.”

“Really? Everyone knows?” Keith pales, pressing a hand to his mouth. Lance can basically feel the panic wafting off him.

“Not everyone. Hey, calm down. I just made an educated guess.”

“No one can know.”

“I won’t tell anyone.”

Keith looks up at him, panic still bubbling under the surface.

“So, what’s up with you two?” Lance regrets not having access to Keith’s emails anymore. Maybe he should have stolen his password or something.  

“Nothing’s up.”

“He fucked you.”

Keith nods, eyes downcast.

“You love him.”

Keith nods again.

Lance already knows this and has read the words himself in the emails, but Keith’s nod feels like a punch in the face all the same. “Why?”

“Why do I love him?”

“Yeah.”

“He’s…I mean, how do you describe Shiro? He’s perfect. He’s so kind and nice and dorky and he’s just like…the sun or something. He makes me feel good about myself.”

Lance is quiet.

“He’s just. You know. Everything,” Keith continues.

Lance snorts.

Keith stares at him. “What does that mean?”

“He isn’t perfect.”

“Yes he is.”

“He hit it and quit it. Pumped and dumped. Left it in the dust after busting that nut. That doesn’t sound perfect.”

“Fuck off. Its complicated. He just…doesn’t know what he wants right now and he’s confused and…”

“And he’s getting his fill while you wait for him to figure things out? Jesus Keith, wake up.”

“It isn’t like that.”

“So he gets to wet his dick whenever he wants and…”

“Stop making it sound so gross.”

“It _is_ gross.”

“It’s not fucking or wetting dicks or anything. We…” Keith blushes and looks away. “We make love.”

Lance can barely stop himself from laughing. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Shiro is an _ass_. He sees a young, vulnerable gay and what? Fucks him?”

“I’m hardly vulnerable!”

“According to the school, you are “at risk” and how old is Shiro anyway? Like, legit, this is statutory rape in some states.”

Keith bristles harder, anger growing. “Don’t ever say that. I’m mature for my age anyway and Shiro would never hurt someone like that.”

“He’s hurting you!”

“He doesn’t mean to and…I love him…”

“And he doesn’t love you and he doesn’t respect you and he never will.”

Keith’s face falls and the temperature of the room seemingly drops 10 degrees. Then he turns and storms out of the room.  

“Keith! Wait!” Lance runs toward him, grabbing at his sleeve, desperately wishing the conversation had gone differently.  

“Seriously, leave me the fuck alone right now or I will hit you, I swear to god,” Keith hisses.  

“Hey! What’s going on over there?” A security guard appears out of nowhere, hurrying over with furrowed brows. Lance freezes, letting Keith go, staying to appease the guard in an attempt not to get kicked out.

He doesn’t see Keith again for the rest of the day. When everyone returns to the car to go home, Hunk explains that Keith wasn’t feeling well so he ubered home. Lance sits in the back of the car, dead silent, fear and worry growing in the pit of his stomach. He didn’t mean to be so angry and abrasive. He’s just so frustrated and Keith talking about Shiro’s perfection doesn’t help.

He shoots off a few quick texts to Keith as soon as no one is looking at him.  

Lance: Keith my buddy my man

Lance: I’m sorry

Lance: I don’t want to see you get hurt

Lance: and it seems like Shiro is hurting you

Lance: I overstepped tho can we talk?  

There is no answer for the rest of the day, long hours spreading out like little eternities that Lance must endure.

The next morning, he has two messages.

Keith: It’s fine

Keith: You didn’t say anything I don’t already know

He doesn’t respond to any more of Lance’s texts for the rest of the day, not apologies, trying to talk, or memes. So Lance does what he does best and compartmentalizes. There is nothing he can do if Keith doesn’t want to interact with him anymore.

There is a party that night anyway and if Keith doesn’t want to talk to him then Lance decides he will throw himself into some fun. There are rumors that college kids would be at the party and maybe that is just what Lance needs-a college girl, mature, worldly, beautiful. High school girls aren’t as alluring as they once were and he is definitely not into people who are in love with someone else.

So Lance goes to the party, downs a few drinks, dances, and generally has a good time forgetting about his current problems. Lance isn’t drunk, but he has had a few, feeling that pleasant buzz and looseness that he associates now with alcohol.

The night goes well and Lance even has a few marks on the horizon that he could potentially see himself ending up naked with at the end of the night. A red-head with huge boobs, a blonde girl wearing a skirt so short he has already seen her underwear. Yes, tonight would be a good night for Lance.

Then, like a beacon in the night, he sees the mullet that has been haunting his dreams. His plans for the redhead and/or blonde go up in smoke immediately. It is strange that Keith is here though. He usually doesn’t go for these types of parties and Lance assumed he especially wouldn’t with the mood he was in earlier. Keith is standing alone near a doorway, looking into a packed room of people with his back to Lance.

Lance grins and makes his way over to that now familiar figure.  He wraps his arms around Keith from behind, laying his head on his shoulder.

“Hey Keithy,” he says, slipping a finger into his waistband. When there is no reaction, he dips deeper, sliding his hand dangerously far down Keith’s bare hip.

Still no reaction.

“Are you really drunk right now?” Lance asks, pressing his lips almost against Keith’s ear.

“No,” Keith answers, voice soft.

Lance feels something wicked sprout in him and all he wants is for Keith to react, to hit him or laugh at him or push him away and call him disgusting or something. So he pulls him even closer, grinding against Keith’s ass with his hips.

Still no reaction.

Lance is about to check how drunk Keith is when he finally actually looks at his face. He has a faraway, sad look on his face, eyes glued in a particular direction. Lance follows Keith’s line of sight and finally sees what has Keith so paralyzed.

Shiro with another dude. A tall, dark-skinned man with glasses. They are on a couch, practically in each other’s laps, and Shiro has his tongue down the other boy’s throat.

Ouch.

Then Keith is turning around, his eyes blazing with pain, but also something else.

He grabs the front of Lance’s shirt and pulls him close.

“Do you really want me?”

Lance smirks, grabbing Keith by the hand and dragging him through the throngs of people. His body seems to be moving on its own and he really sees no further than the step in front of him as he goes up the stairs, winding down the hallway and opening doors until he finds an empty bedroom.

The sheets are pink and he briefly worries that this is a party foul and if they are about to do gross stuff in an innocent place, but all reservations are wiped out when he sees Keith next to him.   

Once inside, Keith looks at him warily, arms crossed. Lance closes the door and locks it. The sound is louder than he expects.  

Keith is his for the night as far as he sees it. Shiro made his choice and it was to suck face with someone who isn’t Keith, who is currently pouting and somehow cute and dangerous at the same time.

“So…” Lance says, suddenly wondering why the fuck he is here in a bedroom alone with Keith.

But then Keith is throwing himself at Lance, kissing him hard. Lance’s head is spinning as he tastes the alcohol on Keith’s breath.

Then he is being pushed on the bed.

“Uh…” he says as Keith rips his shirt off.

“No strings attached. Just sex.”

“Sex…” Lance repeats dumbly after Keith.

Lance stares as Keith pulls his pants off and it finally dawns on him. Keith wants to have sex. Keith is willing to have sex with him. Keith is currently pawing at Lance’s pants zipper because sex is about to happen.  

Lance is frozen, staring, unable to move when Keith suddenly stops and looks at him.  

“You…you don’t want me?”

His voice is small and unsure and everything that Keith is not. Keith is a bull in a china shop. The real Keith is the one that shoved him down on the bed and unclothed himself in 30 seconds flat.

Lance grabs Keith’s hand and presses it against his, admittedly, rock hard erection.

“I want you, sweetheart,” he winks. It seems like the right thing to do at the time. Keith pauses for one more second and then continues, smacking Lance’s hands out of the way and pulling something out of his discarded jeans’ pocket.

A little packet. Like a condom but not.

“Lube,” Keith says, reading the question on Lance’s face.

“Do we need that?”

Keith rolls his eyes. “Just shut up. Let me do this.”

Lance does, watching in amazement as Keith rips the packet open, dips his fingers in, and then sticks them up his ass.

It is the 8th wonder of the world.

Like seeing a miracle spawn in front of your face.

A unicorn appearing out of the middle of a dew-soaked forest.

Seriously.

Keith is hovering over him, half naked and fingering himself.

And Lance’s dick is going to be inside him.

“Heh.”

“What?” Keith asks.

“This is kinda gay.”

“God, shut up.”

Things move quickly after that. Keith does what he needs to do, wincing slightly at his own fingers. Then, Lance is being pushed back onto the bed again and his dick pulled out of his pants.

Keith barely looks at Lance’s dick before quickly lubing him up and then positioning himself on top and slowly lowering himself down.

Lance can’t see much from his position, but he knows he goes from cold and lonely to hot and heavenly in the span of about 10 seconds.

Keith fingering himself wasn’t the miracle. This is.

It’s hot.

It’s tight in ways that are different from what Lance is used to.

Even the wetness feels different.

And it’s Keith.

Then Keith is moving up and down and Lance already knows he won’t be lasting for very long. Now, normally he is not a one minute man, but this is too much, too fast, too good, too different.  

And he knows Shiro is bigger. He knows Shiro is more experienced. But, hell, Lance has his own talents and Keith is for damn sure going to experience them in the 30 seconds or so Lance will be able to hold off from blowing.

He puts a hand on one of those cut hips and rolls his own hips, trying to find a rhythm. Whatever he does must work at least a little as Keith tightens his grip on Lance’s chest and throws his head back.

He hits his rhythm and a moment later loses it, feeling the heat rapidly approaching, unable to hold it back when he thinks about who is riding him right now.

So he comes, right inside Keith.

He wonders if Keith lets Shiro do that. Probably.

Keith doesn’t half-ass anything and that includes sex.  

Lance wants to just roll over and sleep now, but he sees Keith lifting himself off with a stiffy himself. He is hard. He is hard over Lance. And Keith definitely didn’t come.  

“Wait!” Lance cries out, grabbing Keith’s arm.

“It’s fine,” Keith responds.

“No, just, here, let me…”

He grabs Keith’s cock and starts working it. It comes more naturally than he thinks it would. With a girl, you have no idea where anything is located. It is all trial and error and fumbling in the dark. He doesn’t know, intuitively, what feels good where and how or what speed.  

Lance knows how dicks work though. He had been masturbating for years now, thank you very much. It is simple really, knowing what is sensitive and what to avoid.  

He tries not to think about the fact that he is jacking Keith off right now, both half-drunk and in some strange chick’s bedroom.

Thankfully, Keith seems bottled up as well and it isn’t too long before he is coming too, splashing across the sheets.

Lance has one brief moment of happiness before his clear, post-nut brain takes over. Lance suddenly sobers up in every sense. The clouds clear. He can think again.

And he realizes he just fucked Keith.

He put his dick in Keith.

Then he had willingly jerked him off.  

Panic spreads across him.

“I’m not gay!” he yells.

Keith isn’t looking at him though and barely reacts as he slowly pulls his clothes back on.

“I mean…shit. I’m not, but…” Lance fumbles over what he actually wants to say.

Keith still stares at the floor, eyes dark and blank as he starts to put on his shoes.       

“Do we need to talk?” Lance asks.

“No,” Keith responds.

“You…you good then?”

“Yep. You know. A hole is a hole, right?” There is a resigned bitterness to Keith’s voice. He looks small again, defeated. Lance feels bile rise in his chest. Everything is moving too fast and he is confused and Keith just needs to sit down and wait. Lance is convinced if he just has 10 minutes or so to process that he can make this right, whatever this is.   

But Keith never waits. He is already opening the door, still keeping his eyes trained downward. Lance is finally able to move and runs after him, not even bothering to zip up his pants. He runs out the door, reaching for a speed walking Keith’s arm, trying to force the boy to talk to him when his own arm is grabbed out of nowhere.

Lance comes to a quick stop. The person who grabbed him emerges from a dark side hallway.

It is someone with a ridiculously firm grip. Someone with a ridiculously huge hand.

Lance turns and sees the wall of Shiro standing there, grey eyes angrily drilling into him.

He swallows slowly, taking one last look as Keith disappears down the stairs and then turns to face Shiro.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Lance


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro and Lance have a little chat, Keith reveals something about himself, and Lance is still a hopeless disaster, but maybe a little more self-aware.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is such a disaster sdjkwshfksdhgufkhfe

“Excuse me? You wanna say that to me again?”

So, being aggressive to Shiro, someone built like a literal mountain of muscle, is not part of the plan, not even when Shiro grabs him and drags him angrily into the hallway bathroom. Lance isn’t a lightweight. He works out, he swims, he lifts, and he’s tall. But, he also isn’t stupid. He knows this isn’t a fight he would ever win against Mr. God of High School and Abs and Quads himself.

But there is only so much he can take. He is reeling with the fact that he just touched Keith’s dick (not to mention, you know, the being inside him). He had sex with a dude and enjoyed it. He’s still trying to remember if their balls touched or not when Keith runs out, obviously upset. Lance doesn’t like that. It isn’t Keith’s fault he has a dick. The cherry on top of this confusing cake is the fact that his pants are still undone. He is confronting Takashi Shirogane, god-like senior, with his pants undone and a little bit of Keith’s cum still on his hands.

Then here is Shiro saying one of the dumbest things Lance has ever heard.

“I said…” Shiro says, teeth gritted and a hand still on Lance’s arm. “What did you do to Keith?”

“What did **_I_** do to Keith?”

“Yes.”

“Shouldn’t you be asking what _you_ did to Keith?”

“I wasn’t in the bedroom with Keith, alone, where he later ran out nearly in tears. If you hurt him…”

And Lance can’t. He can’t even right now. “If _I_ hurt him? Seriously, dude, do you hear yourself?”

There is a flicker of recognition in Shiro’s eyes.

“First, if you are implying what I think you’re implying, fuck right off. Second, if we’re keeping track of who’s hurting Keith you need to look directly at yourself, _man_.” Lance shoves Shiro’s hand off his arm.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“You sucked some dude’s face right in front of him.”

“What does that have to do with Keith.”

It is said like a statement rather than a question and Lance is pretty sure that Shiro knows exactly what it has to do with Keith, but he is playing dumb for some reason and it infuriates him even more.

“You know he loves you.”

“He told you that?”

“It’s obvious. You want to know why he is so upset? Try you jerking him around, fucking and chucking him as it pleases you then bringing some other dude to a party and making out with him in Keith’s lap.”

Shiro is momentarily silent, mouth pressed in a line. “And why do you care so much?”

“What the fuck does that mean? I’m not some unfeeling asshole.”

“So, your interest in me and Keith and our relationship is solely because you have a heart.” Shiro lifts a perfect eyebrow.

“He’s my fucking friend. You can’t just take his virginity and then ditch him.”

“Jealous?”

“Excuse me?”

“That I got there first?”

There is at least a 30 second silence while Lance tries to compute his words.

“I…why…why would…” he sputters, his righteous rage wavering.

Shiro just smiles at him.

Lance gathers himself. “I’m not gay. Why would I care who Keith loses his virginity to unless they are an asshole like you.”

“Oh, you aren’t? So, you’re telling me that your dick wasn’t anywhere inside Keith tonight?”

Lance is so angry now that he can’t even respond, knowing every response would just make him sound worse and, to be fair, he is having trouble resolving the whole “I’m not gay but I enjoyed sex with Keith” conundrum himself.  

Shiro settles his hand on Lance’s shoulder. “Maybe you should just stay out of this…and out of Keith. Ok?”

Then he is gone, leaving Lance alone with his thoughts, thoughts that slide all over the place for the rest of the night, settling in unexpected places.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The next school day starts as normal, except for the fact that Lance gets the distinct feeling that everyone is looking at him. He walks toward his locker, discreetly checking to make sure his fly isn’t down. Then, sharp fingernails dig into his arm.

“Nyma.” He doesn’t even need to look at her face to know it is her, recognizing the pointed, glittered tips she preferred on her nails.  

They had been involved for a while, but both decided they worked better as friends. Or, at least the type of acquaintances that occasionally gossip or smoke weed together at a party.

“Lance…there are rumors,” she says excitedly, blonde hair bobbing with her head.

“Wh…what?” Lance asks.

“That Keith is a big homo and tried to kiss you at the party.”

“Oh…”

“Then you punched him. Gross. Why do homos pull that shit?”

Lance laughs awkwardly and really, really wishes that he had some warning, some time to figure out how to approach this.

“Well, I don’t blame him. No one can resist Lancey Lance,” Lance smirks at her.

It isn’t until she is walking away that he realizes that he basically just confirmed the rumor and that Nyma would have that confirmation spread across the school by lunch.

Lance suddenly feels very sick to his stomach.

Had he just outed Keith? Had he outed himself? Which is impossible since he isn’t gay. Also, Keith isn’t some “homo”…he is Keith, a friend, a person, and someone he definitely did not punch.  

Lance doesn’t even know where to start so he puts his head down and successfully avoids life until lunch.

At lunch, he has two wary and disappointed looking friends staring at him when he makes his way to the table. Keith isn’t there, which is what Lance expected.

“Hey guys,” Lance says casually as he plops down and shoves a fry in his mouth.  

“Don’t hey guys us. Are the rumors true?” Pidge asks immediately.

“What rumors?” Lance wants to know exactly what they heard.

The two share a look before Hunk presses forward.

“That Keith hit on you…like, tried to have sex with you and then you turned him down.”

“And then you hit him for it. Gave him a black eye,” Pidge adds.

“No…no it isn’t true…” Lance fumbles. Everything seems out of control now.

“If you really hit him just because he is gay and hit on you…” Pidge says, voice low.

“I don’t believe Lance would do that,” Hunk fires back.

“I never hit Keith. Ever. Just something happened at a party and people must have seen some of it or something.”

“So you didn’t spread the rumors either? Because outing someone is no bueno even if they hit on you,” Hunk says.  

“No, no, I didn’t even know there were rumors until this morning. See, at the party…” Lance pauses, unsure what he could say. He doesn’t want to confirm anything, but he also isn’t expecting the open hostility that Pidge is giving him or the suspicion on Hunk’s face or the guilt growing in his stomach at the idea that maybe he is in the wrong here even if he didn’t hit Keith.

“Yeah Lance. Tell them exactly what happened at the party.” A voice rings out behind them.

The center of all the rumors is standing behind them with a leather jacket and fingerless gloves on. Lance looks Keith over, noting that he does, in fact, have a black eye, one that wasn’t there when he saw Keith over the weekend.

The lunch room quiets and people are not even trying to hide their stares as Keith looms over them.

“Keith!” Pidge says.

“Are you ok, man?” Hunk asks.  

“I’m fine. In fact…” and then he turns away from them, facing the majority of the lunch room. Then, he yells.

“I’m gay. I like to suck dick. If anyone has a problem with it, then you are free to say it to my face!” Keith’s middle school fights are not completely forgotten and its safe to say that absolutely no one has any desire to confront him and say anything to his face.  

Everything is silent for an unbearable amount of time. Then there is laughter and voices and Keith is stalking out of the lunch room and Lance can’t let him leave again. He is tired of seeing that mullet running away.

Lance runs after him, weaving through his classmates who are now in hysterics. Lance ignores them. Right now, he needs to keep an eye on Keith.  

He follows him all the way outside, to the little private area that he had seen Shiro and Keith earlier in the week.

“Keith…” he says, trying to get him to stop walking.

“What? You have something to say to me?”

Lance grabs Keith’s tensed arm.

“Who hit you?”

“What?”

“Your eye…I’ll kill whoever did it.” Lance means it, but silently hopes that the answer isn’t Shiro because Shiro would kill him.

Keith finally turns, eyeing Lance up and down.

“I did.”

“You…hit yourself?”

“No…yes…it was an accident. I was angry and working on a motorcycle and a wrench slipped and smacked me.”

“That sounds like a lie.”

“It’s the truth. Come on. You don’t think I would put someone in the hospital if they punched me?”

Lance searches Keith’s face, finally accepting that it’s the truth.

“Ok. Ok. I know a lot is going on right now and I’ve been thinking about what happened at the party. We need to talk.”

“We don’t have to. We can just pretend it didn’t happen.”

“No, we can’t. This is important. You don’t understand.” Lance watches as Keith shifts and looks down. Then Keith straightens back up, looking him directly in the eye, face somehow blank and anxious.  

“Give me another chance.”

Keith blinks. “What?”

“I can do better. I was drunk. It was weird. But I promise I can last longer.”

“You want to fuck me again?”

“Yes? No! Don’t make it sound like that. It’s a rivalry thing. It’s…I have to guard my honor, my reputation. I’m a good fuck and I won’t have YOU sullying that. I’m onto you, Keith.”

Keith leans over for a second, hands on his knees. Then he straightens up suddenly. In two strides, he moves in front of Lance. One hand goes on the wall beside Lance’s head. Keith is suddenly really close, somehow feeling even closer than when they were literally attached to each other at the party.  

“Yeah? You gonna fuck me good next time?” He whispers by Lance’s ear. His voice is doing that obnoxious thing it does when it goes all low and gravely and Lance is mesmerized. He swallows, simultaneously unable to look away and unable to focus on any one place, Keith’s throat, his lips, his hair… Keith presses his body against Lance, just gentle pressure, but enough to make Lance flush from head to toe.

Then he’s gone.

“Wait! What was that!” Lance squeaks, indignant as he watches Keith stalk off, yet again.

“Oh nothing, just two bros being bros, zero feet apart because they’re not gay,” Keith yells back at him, storming back into the school, head held high.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is my disaster fic in that I have general scenes planned but not like, a firm story arc and end. I am having a lot of fun writing Shiro as an ass and Lance as a dumbass though. Not sure how far I want to take Shiro's assholeness or how much I want to torture poor Keith though lmao.
> 
> Anyway, Blood Paladin is DEF next and its gonna be an intense chapter. Then, not sure what I will work on next. I have a Lodak one shot and a Shklance one shot that I am working on. I am also newly inspired to update one of my old fics that was supposedly completed (Three is a Charm).


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance hates Shiro. A lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the most annoying chapter i have ever written WOW lol skdckuehfuheiu

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Keith: Jesus, what?

Lance: your ignoring me

Keith: And?

Lance: y

Keith: Maybe I’m busy

Lance: lol lies we all know you have no life and the 3 people you may hang out with other than me have after-school events rn

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith your ignoring me again

Lance had spent the entire afternoon trying to get Keith to respond to him before devolving into spamming his name. He isn’t entirely sure what he wants from Keith right now. He had chased Keith back into the school after what happened, but Hunk and Pidge had gotten to him first, wrapping him up in big bear hugs and telling him how much they love and support him.

Which, ok, makes Lance feel a little guilty. Maybe that should have been his reaction rather than being a little shit to Keith and then fucking him.

But that still doesn’t give Keith the right to ignore him.

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Keith: WHAT

Lance: entertain me. wanna come over?

Keith: Im not in the mood

Lance: Keith

Lance: what are you doing this weekend

Keith: Im busy

Lance: lies

Keith: not this time

Lance: i can come over to your place?

Keith: No. No you can’t.

Lance: Keith.

Keith: Im turning notifs off for the night.

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: suck my dick?

Lance: I’m lonely

Lance: Keith

Lance: do you think crowley and aziphrale are gay?

Lance: Keith

Lance: You should know since you are, like…gay

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Do you celebrate pride?

Lance: Keith 

Keith doesn’t respond though, not during the night or the next morning or at school. Lance is screaming on the inside, unable to handle being ignored. He might be going crazy, but he is buzzing to have Keith near him right now.

However,, Keith basically ignores him, maybe even avoids him through most of the school day. Which is fine, because lunch is Lance’s time. He will find any hiding spot Keith might hole up in if he tries to avoid the lunchroom. He is like a bloodhood hound now with Keith’s scent. Lance won’t be denied.

Lance approaches the lunch table, not really expecting to see that familiar mop of black hair sitting there with Pidge and Hunk. Keith is leaned across the table, head turned away, but he would recognize that mullet anywhere. He charges over, a smile slapping across his face, giddy at the thought of being able to annoy Keith more.

He is only two steps from the table when Keith shifts, leaning back, which both allows Lance to see his face and reveals who else is sitting at the table.

Shiro.

Shiro is sitting beside Keith.

At the table.

Their table.

His table.

In his spot.

Shiro.

Lance freezes and would borderline turn and walk away to gather himself except he is seen.

“Lance! How great to see you!” Shiro’s voice booms out, a broad smile on his face.

Lance hates him.

The others turn toward him as well, greeting him normally except for Keith who looks at him and then looks down at his hands before glancing toward Shiro again.

Lance cautiously makes his way over to the table, gingerly sitting down next to Pidge, because the worst person in the world is currently occupying where Lance should be sitting.

“We were just talking about Shiro throwing the winning touchdown last game!” Pidge says.

“Oh, it was nothing. Anything to bring pride to our school,” Shiro responds.

“It was amazing,” Keith says.

“You don’t even like sports,” Lance bites back.

“I…like them sometimes,” Keith responds, crossing his arms over his chest.

Lance is two seconds away from punching the smug face off Shiro.

“Well, I can swim faster than anyone I know.”

“Uh…that’s nice?” Keith responds.

“So, Shiro, I heard the coaches went all out for the afterparty. Did you go?” Hunk asks.  

“No, I had to miss it unfortunately. I had to leave to get to bed early in time to go give a speech to a group of disadvantaged children at the group home in town.”

Lance snorts and rolls his eyes.

“That sounds interesting,” Hunk says, shooting a look at Lance.  

“Yes, such important work to help people, especially guiding the next generation.”

Lance snorts, again, struggling not to point out that “guiding” for Keith meant him guiding his dick right into his body over and over again. If Hunk and Pidge weren’t there, he might have.

“Is something wrong Lance? Are you thirsty?” Shiro asks, maintaining a big smile.

“I volunteer at an animal shelter!”

There is a moment of silence and he deliberately ignores the looks Pidge and Hunk are giving him and the facepalming Keith.

“That’s nice. My family and I have fostered dogs for as long as I can remember. The last litter was a hard one. I hand-nursed the puppies for nearly a month,” Shiro responds.  

“I hand-nursed kittens before!” Lance bites back.  

“One of our newest dogs is also paralyzed. I am helping him walk again by completing vet-approved water therapy. He is such a trooper.”

Lance is outraged, but can’t say much when Shiro pulls out his phone to show everyone a little dog with a sling across its belly in the water.

Everyone coos appropriately while Lance silently fumes. Who can beat that?

He is still grumbling to himself when he catches the tail end of a sentence.

“….Matt and Keith will be there,” Shiro says.

Lance’s head snaps up. “What? Will be where?”

“Prepping for Camp Nitro,” Keith answers.

“Again, what?” Lance responds.

“I invited Keith to help set up for Camp Nitro. That’s a camp where disadvantaged teens come and get to spend time outdoors, working out, playing sports. We have a lot of fun. Of course, this weekend is just prep, but Matt dropped out so,” Shiro grins at Lance, nearly every tooth showing. “It will just be me and Keith, alone at the camp all weekend.”

Lance’s stomach drops.

“Matt is so angry he can’t come this year,” Pidge responds.

“Thankfully Keith can step in. We will be setting up equipment, testing stuff, planning…”

“Sounds like a lot of work,” Hunk says.

“Oh, I imagine we will get _quite_ the workout this weekend,” Shiro says, looking straight at Lance.

And, ok. If Shiro wants to play, then so does Lance. He clears his throat, steels himself, and then asks.  

“So, Shiro, how is your boyfriend?”

There is a stretch of silence. Lance knows he’s being a moron, but it’s worth seeing the smug look on Shiro’s face disappear.

It isn’t worth the way Keith’s head drops and how he suddenly looks away from everyone.

“You must have heard incorrectly. I don’t have a boyfriend. I have been on a few dates here and there, but these last few weeks I have just been focusing on what I really want.”

It’s a carefully worded answer and one that leaves the door wide open. He could be dating someone, sort of, or maybe not. Its unfair, especially when Keith turns and smiles at Shiro in a heart-breaking way.

Lance clenches his fists, suddenly losing his appetite.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Lance: Keith?

Keith: Yes

Lance: HE ANSWERS

Keith: What do you want

Lance: i dunno

Keith: lol true in more than one way

Lance: were you avoiding me at school

Keith: No?

Lance: it felt like it

Keith: Not everything is about you. Its weird, you know. Being out. So I kept to myself.

Lance: oh. anyone giving you trouble?

Keith: Uh, no one but you.

Lance: you wound me

Keith: You know

Keith: there are rumors about me and you and if you hang out with me there will be more rumors.

Lance: so?

Keith: Well, as a “straight” guy that might bother you

Lance: my straightness isn’t changed by what other people think

Keith: and its also not changed by having sex with me, a dude, who like…has a dick?

Lance: it doesn’t count unless you are the one being penetrated that’s how it works

Lance sees the little ellipses show up and disappear, indicating that Keith is typing.  

The message never comes though and eventually the dots disappear.  

Lance: why was Shiro at our lunch table today

Keith: It’s a free country

Lance: i don’t like him

Keith: Why not?

Lance: he’s a dick.

Keith: Are you sure that’s the only reason?

Lance: he’s a dick to you.

Keith: Getting closer.

Lance: i don’t get it. but you know whats gonna happen at that stupid camp.

Keith: its fine

Lance: no its not. you aren’t ok with it either.

Keith: yeah but maybe things have changed now

Lance: ?

Keith: Im out now so like…maybe that is what Shiro needed from me. Maybe I have a chance?

Lance: Keith…

Keith: just, I know what im doing. Im going to sleep now. Won’t really be checking my phone much this weekend.

Lance: nite

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Lance: Keith

Lance: are you up?

Lance: whatcha doing

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: when do I get another chance

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: that dumb show you like was suggested on Netflix for me the one with dragon in the title but like no dragons

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: wanna storm area 51 with me?

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: Keith

Lance: don’t have sex with Shiro this weekend

Lance: Keith?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am a little curious about how readers feel about this and also i may use this poll option to help decide which one shots i write in the future since my multi-chaps are wrapping up now. so, im also testing polling people to see if people take it or it flops?  
> anyway, here is a poll about the end of this fic. it should be completely anonymous and, again, im just curious how you guys see this ending lol.
> 
>  
> 
> [Poll for this fic](http://www.polljunkie.com/poll/wbfcxz/keith#question0)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith comes back from camp and him and Lance have a much needed talk. Maybe not the one you are thinking of though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, I did a poll for this fic and there is a very clear majority for who most people want Keith to end up with and a dark horse second place that I think might be fun.   
> i have a general ending in mind, just like...it could be tailored in slightly different directions.   
> 121 votes though damn i expected to get like, 20 at most.

Lance does not spend that weekend thinking about Keith.

He does not send more texts throughout the weekend.

He does not dream about dark hair at night.

He does not stay up thinking about Shiro and his filthy hands on Keith’s body.

He definitely does not count down the hours until Keith is expected back from stupid fucking Camp Nitro prep.

It is Sunday night when he gets a text message and almost forgets to check it, assuming it will be Pidge or Hunk or some cousin or maybe his mom telling him to get something from the store the next day.

Instead, the person he _hasn’t_ been thinking about at all has messaged him. He opens it as fast as possible.

Keith: H

Keith: Hiu

Keith: Hi

Lance: oh i thought you were this hot girl i met this weekend. damn.

In Lance’s defense, he totally could have met a hot girl this weekend. He almost went to a party.

Keith: Lamnce

Keith: Lannnnnccccccccccccces

Lance: ur being weird

Keith: canm I comd over?

Lance: now? tonite?

Keith: im outside

Lance: where are u

Keith: youre windero

Keith: window

Lance freezes and then walks over to his window, throwing open the curtain. Even though he was given some time to prepare, he still jumps and squeals when he sees Keith standing there, only a few feet from his window.

Lance: duuuuuuude

Keith: I can see uuuuuuuu

Lance opens the window and Keith takes this as an invitation, running over and crawling into the window.

“My mom will kill me…oh god. Keith?”

Keith literally tumbles into the window, giggling.

“Are you drunk?”

“Maybe,” Keith responds, looking up at Lance from the floor.

“Why are you drunk and outside my window?”

“I’m not.”

“You are!”

“I’m not outside your window. I’m on your floor.”

“Christ…”

Lance leans over, pulling a boneless Keith up and pushing him onto his bed.

This turns out to be a big mistake. Keith immediately latches onto Lance, fumbling as he kisses Lance’s cheek.

“Fuck me,” he rasps into Lance’s ear.  

“What?”

“You heard me. I want you.”

“You’re drunk…”

“So? I know you want to fuck me again.” Keith spreads his legs and pulls on the button of Lance’s pants.

“No.” Lance swats his hand away.

“You don’t want me?” Keith’s voice trembles and Lance wonders how this went from a boring night into a _situation_.

“No, I do. I mean. I don’t. I do. You are…ok let me start over.”

Keith looks up at him, dark eyes shiny with unspilled tears.

“You’re too drunk to enjoy sex with me right now. Why don’t we cuddle instead?”

“Cuddle?”

“Yeah, we can just…you know, lay here. Get cozy. Two bros, one bed. No homo.”

“You want to cuddle me?”

“Maybe that wasn’t the right word…”

Lance is cut off by Keith dragging him down. In a split second, he is on his bed with Keith latched around him like some sort of koala or octopus. His limbs seem to multiply, and Lance isn’t sure he would be able to escape even if he wanted to.

Drunk Keith is strong and knows what he wants.

“So, dude. Uh. Why are you drunk and trying to score some Lance Lovin on a school night?”

Keith shrugs, not lifting his face from Lance’s chest.

“How was your weekend?” Lance asks tentatively.

“hezhasuhboyfren,” Keith mutters into his chest.

“A little slower,” Lance prompts, stroking Keith’s hair.

“Hehasaboyfriend,” Keith repeats.

“He? Who?”

“Shiro. Duh.”

“Uh, didn’t he say he doesn’t have a boyfriend earlier this week?”

“Well, he’s a lying liar who lies and I hate him.”

“How did you find out?”

“Phone. I read his phone. Name’s Adam. A freshman in college. I hate him.”

Lance blinks. He doesn’t think too highly of Shiro, but for some reason the complete lie to the entire table surprises him.

“Are you sure? Maybe they are old texts or it’s a misunderstanding.” He isn’t sure why he is giving Shiro any benefit of the doubt, but maybe it has to do with the trembling boy in his arms.

“They have an anniversary. Coming up. Shiro’s met his fuckin parents. They…they have pet names and…” Keith’s voice cracks. “They tell each other they love each other.”

Then Keith is crying and oh boy. Oh boy Lance is not prepared for this. Maybe he should have fucked him. Maybe he should have never opened that window.  

Instead, he awkwardly pats Keith on the back, letting him cry himself to sleep. Lance eventually passes out as well.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lance wakes up in the morning feeling warm and safe. He likes sleeping in the same bed as someone else. He likes the feeling of someone else’s warmth and heartbeat close to him. His eyes flutter open and Keith is there. Right there, as in inches from his face. They are sharing a pillow, for god’s sake.  

His head is leaned back and his mouth hangs open as he sleeps. His hair is a mess. He stinks like booze and someone who just went camping without showering. A little drool has pooled on Lance’s pillow.

In short, he looks stunning.

An angel.

Unfairly cute.

The adorable version of the prickly boy Lance knows.

Lance blinks and pulls back, realizing that Keith is literally in his arms, curled up beside his body. It’s intimate. It’s close. It’s tender. They are sleeping exactly no inches apart because they are…aren’t gay!

Lance acts before thinking, taking both hands, pressing them against Keith’s side, and shoving with all his strength. Keith tumbles off the bed, crashing to the ground with a thump and a “what the fuck!”

“You…gay…you…slept in my bed!!” Lance fumbles.

“I…Lance? Where am I?”

“You forced yourself into my bed!”

A look of fear flickers across Keith’s face. “I did? What did I do?”

Even in his panic, Lance won’t let Keith think anything like that happened.

“You tricked me into me sleeping with you.”

“Like, sleeping or?”

“Actual sleeping, not fucking, though you offered that too. We cuddled. I cradled you in my arms!”

“You’re upset we cuddled?”

“Yes, Keith, for your information, I’m straight and straight men don’t fucking cuddle!”

Keith drags one hand down his face before standing up.

“Go fuck yourself, Lance,” he spits, making his way toward the window.

Lance watches him reach the window, freeze, then spin and face him again.

“No. Before you go fuck yourself, listen to me because I’m only going to say this once. First, cuddling is something everyone can enjoy, even straight men so fuck off with that gender bullshit. Second, you keep telling yourself you aren’t gay and that you’re straight, like those are the only two options. I’m not sure if you realize, but there is an entire spectrum of genders and sexualities out there.”

Lance opens his mouth to speak.  

“No, shut up. Seriously. To start with, you could be bisexual, pansexual, or demisexual. I don’t have the time to explain the differences and nuances here for you, but all of those can be attracted to two or more genders. You could also just be queer, which is what some people call their sexuality. Or, you could be a range of other possibilities, biromantic, panromantic, heteroromantic but sexually fluid, or just plain old questioning. It’s fine, you know, to explore, to be curious, to question, but _Christ._ Fucking read a book or take a class. Educate yourself or something and stop acting like the two possibilities out there are straight and gay and men and women. Now go fuck yourself!” 

Keith screams, pulling on his hair once before tumbling back out the window from where he came, leaving a stunned Lance on the bed.

Lance watches the open window for a moment.

“You can be attracted to more than one gender at the same time?” Lance asks his now empty room.

He barely even reacts when his mother runs through the door, wondering who is in her son’s room yelling on an early Monday morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will also be ending soon. maybe 3 more chaps? im trying to end some of my multi chaps so i can get back to doing one shots of various pairings and dynamics.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance has an epiphany and then tries to get in Keith's pants again to mixed results

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i always feel like i need to apologize when i update this fic. like, god what am i doing with my life.

There is a solid 60 seconds of silence when, later in the week, Lance waltzes up to the lunch table.

Lance grins at his friends, shooting them finger guns as Hunk chokes on his sandwich, Pidge’s eye twitches, and Keith looks like he is in physical pain.

It doesn’t matter how many people today have given him strange looks though.

Lance feels alive.

He is _living._

His conversation with Keith had led to an epiphany which had led him to finally be honest with who he is, including telling his family and now, everyone else in the only way he can imagine. In Lance style, if you will.

He is wearing a pink, purple, and blue hoodie. His hair is held back by a pink, purple, and blue headband. He has pink, purple, and blue shoelaces and bracelets on. The real kicker is the shirt though.

“The Bible says Adam _and_ Eve” in the same pink, purple, and blue.

“Uh, buddy?” Hunk says.

“I’m bisexual, baby. Hide your husbands _and_ wives!”

Then he is being embraced, Hunk and Pidge both celebrating him as one should when someone comes out. Keith remains characteristically silent, pushing around some peas on his plate.

“So, wow. I never would have guessed it,” Pidge says when they sit again.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lance asks suspiciously.

“You seem really straight?” Hunk says, cautiously.

“Well, so did Keith…”

“Nope,” Pidge responds. “Keith is like, turbo gay. Sorry.”

“I mean, yeah. You can’t assume anything, but I wasn’t that surprised. No offense, Keith,” Hunk says.

“None taken. I do love men, a lot.”

Lance pouts, but quickly moves past it. Today is his day and the day he achieves all of his dreams.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~

He follows his dreams, otherwise known as Keith, to the bathroom and then down a hallway toward the library. Keith veers off though, down another hallway instead of turning into the library. He follows a few yards behind before he hears Keith sigh, loudly.

“I know you’re there.”

Lance quickly walks up to him, wrapping his arms around Keith from behind.

“We can do this now.”

“Do what?”

“Fuck.”

“What makes you think I want to fuck you.”

“You let me do it before.”

“That wasn’t about you.”

“Come on, Keithy…”

“I’m not just some hole for guys to get off in,” Keith’s voice waivers.

“No, you aren’t. But I’m not straight anymore.”

Keith huffs. “Why does that matter? Men can be assholes, straight or not.”

“Yeah, but it’s not just about getting off.”

“You are still a total asshole.”

“But like, not a straight asshole anymore…come on Keith, let me in.”

He kisses him gently on the neck before licking at his ear.

He’s trying so hard to seduce him, to make Keith see this could be fun, way more fun than fucking stupid Shiro. He desperately wants Keith to react to him, to kiss him back, to let him have another go at him and make it better than their first, desperate, quickie.  

“Did you pretend to be bi just to get in my pants again?” Keith asks.  

“What? No. You’d have to be crazy…”

“I mean, it’s you…”

“I’m an asshole, but not straight or crazy.” Lance rubs his hands down Keith’s body, gently touching the skin that he can still remember from weeks ago at that party. He knows exactly how the dip of Keith’s hips will feel.

“Come on Keith. Let’s fuck.”

He feels Keith go limp for a moment before straightening up.

Then, he turns around suddenly.

“Ok,” he says, deadpan.  

“Ok?”

“Yep.”

Then Keith is kissing him, pulling Lance into his body.

There is tongue and soft lips and Lance leans into it. There is no reason to pretend he doesn’t like it now. Keith is all over him then, pressing his hips against Lance, licking at his mouth, squeezing their bodies close.

Then, Keith brings one knee between Lance’s legs and draws back.  There is a dangerous look on his face, a smirk that Lance should know better than to trust.

“One condition…” Keith says.

“Anything.”

“This time, I’m fucking you.”

Lance’s head whites out. No words reach his mouth as Keith continues smirking at him.

“But…”

“But what? You wanna fuck? This is how we fuck. You aren’t straight so it’s fine, right?”

Lance opens his mouth and then closes it.

Time moves quickly after that, Keith tells him to come by his house that Friday and that his parents would be gone so they could be alone. Lance is in a trance though, barely engaging the rest of the day before going home to lay motionless on his bed.  

Once again, Keith’s dick is the only thing Lance thinks about all night.

Could he?

Could he really let Keith inside him?

Initially, it seems impossible.

His ass had always seemed like an exit only. He had tried to wedge a finger in there once and had not succeeded. He couldn’t achieve any penetration and it hurt.  

But Lance is not a quitter, not when he wants something. And what he wants is another chance at Keith’s ass even if it means sacrificing his own.

Logically, Lance knows it’s possible. He had pooped things before that were about the size of a dick. He knows people, straight or not, have anal sex. He knows an entire category of sex toys exists that is just anal dildos and plugs. He had even had anal sex with Keith and knows that Shiro somehow fit inside Keith too.   

Keith’s dick isn’t even that big. Lance takes a moment to smirk smugly at his ceiling. Smaller than Lance’s and probably way, way smaller than Shiro’s.

Lance grins, relieved.  

He can do this.

He can bottom.

He can and he will.

He will let Keith go where no man or foreign object has ever gone before.

He will climb this mountain.

He will achieve his hopes and dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will end with chapter 13! also, 13 will be an epilogue that is fairly short and posted at the same time as #12 (or very close). im working hard to finish all my multi-chapter fics soon-ish (they were all near the end anyway) so that i can have one hell of a kink/darktober.   
> i will be taking suggestions for that, likely putting a link or whatever or maybe my twitter or something when the series ends.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and Keith have...quite an experience together while Keith is home alone. 
> 
> (They do it)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End of Chapter Edited about 4 hours after posting** 
> 
> i'm so sorry for anyone who wanted this to be sexy.

_Breathe in_

1…2…3

_Out_

4…5…6

_Relax_

6…5…4

_Let go_

3…2…1

Lance has never worked so hard for something in his life. It feels like more work than when he wanted to be an amazing soccer player or when he was failing math and had to catch up in two weeks or when he had to crash study for his Catholic Confirmation his mom wanted him to get so badly.

He’s researched. He’s bought supplies. And he’s practiced. Oh yes, he’s practiced.

All for this moment.

He knocks firmly on the door, squirming just a bit before the door opens to reveal a genuinely surprised looking Keith wearing only a pair of sweatpants.

“Wha?” he says, scratching his head.

“Hey, samurai, ready for a good time?” Lance says, leaning in a way he hopes look sexy across the door frame.

Keith blinks and then rolls his eyes.

“You sound like a hooker.”

He steps aside then, face still twisted.

“What’s the matter?”

“I didn’t think you would actually show.”

“You calling me a coward?”

“What? No…just…”

“Cuz I’m no coward.”

“Jesus.”

Lance immediately walks toward Keith’s bedroom, shoulders squared and head held high.

“You know, we don’t…like, have to jump into this immediately,” Keith says behind him.

“Now who sounds like a coward?”

“Neither of us are cowards!”

Lance launches himself at the bed, throwing off his clothes in record time and then staring at Keith expectantly.

Keith stands still in the doorway though, looking at Lance with an unreadable facial expression.

“Well?” Lance says. Then he flicks his hand down the expanse of his body like he is showing it off for Keith. “Get on in.”

“Uh,” Keith says, taking a step forward. “This is weird. Weird and not sexy.”

Lance huffs. Then, he draws on his research from the last few days, the lithe boys he had seen wiggling around for their tops on Pornbub.   

“What?” he sits up and stretches his entire body out as he slowly takes off his shirt. “You don’t want,” then he slinks down, twisting and popping his hip up, “to fuck me senseless?” He spanks his ass as the coup d’état.

“I hate you so much,” Keith whines.

Lance looks over, ready to try another tactic when he notices it.

“Ah ha! You’re hard!” Lance points excitedly.

“Shut up! I’m a teenager with a boy in my bed it doesn’t take much!”

“Come on Keithers. Don’t you want to have some fun?” Lance wiggles his body again, hoping something looks attractive. He’s never tried attracting men before, so it’s a shot in the dark.

“Don’t ever call me that again.” But nevertheless, Keith makes his way over to the bed. He crawls tentatively onto the mattress, reaching out to touch Lance’s cheek.

Lance jerks back. “Hey, I said fuck me, don’t be gay about it.”

“Ok, that’s it,” Keith says, starting to get off the bed again. Lance grabs his arm.

“Ok, fine. I’ll shut up. Or maybe you should make me shut up?”

He’s lucky that Keith is easy. He gazes at Lance once more and then turns, positioning himself over Lance.  

“Ok?” Keith asks.

“Ok,” Lance nods in affirmation.

Lance tries to relax into his hold, letting Keith push him back and settle on top of him. His hands rub down his shoulders, his sides, then slowly below the belt. Keith slowly rubs against him, breathing getting heavier. Lance grinds against Keith, relaxing back into his surprisingly soft sheets.

“You’re lucky you’re hot,” Keith murmurs, dipping his hand down to Lance’s cock. He strokes it a few times before dipping around to the other side, the forbidden zone.    

Lance can’t help it, breathing exercises and reminders to relax be damned. He stiffens up, clenching his teeth.

Keith briefly cups his ass and there is a moment of ragged breath before he is suddenly gone, standing in the center of the room and leaving Lance cold.

Lance sighs loudly. “What now?”

“I can’t do this.”

“Why not?”

“You seem uncomfortable. I can tell. I don’t…I can’t do that to someone.”

“I mean, I’m nervous but it’s not like I’m going to go back on my word.”

“That’s the problem. I don’t want to coerce anyone into sex or have sex with someone who is only doing it for reasons…other than the right ones.”

“And what are the “right” ones?”

“I want you to want it and like it, not just do it because I might call you a coward or something.”

Lance smiles. “Who would have known you were a big romantic? I’m not doing it because of that. I want to try it now that I am not straight anymore.”

Keith stares at him and then huffs. “Just because you aren’t straight doesn’t mean you have to want to have anal sex. Some mlms never do it.”

“Multi-level marketing?”

“No, bi men, gay men…”

“You could have just said that…and I mean, yeah, I get that and I know I’m a little tense but it’s my first time. I want to do it though. I don’t give a shit if you call me a coward.” Ok, a small white lie on Lance’s part at the end there.

Keith still looks apprehensive, rubbing his thumbs against his gloves.

“You know…” Lance cocks his head in Keith’s direction, smiling. “I fingered myself for like, an hour before I came here.”

“WHAT?” Keith eyes go comically wide.

“Yep. Wanted to be good and loose for you. Trust me, I put in a lot of effort. I researched. I practiced. I’ve fingered myself so much over the last few days that my fingers are sore. I think **you** are the coward. Don’t promise me dick, make me prepare for it, and then take it away.” He crosses his arms across his chest.

“You are such a…”

“An amazing piece of ass you are trying to turn down for no reason?”

“A brat. You’re a brat.”

Keith crosses the room in two steps, and, before Lance knows it, he’s on his back again, pushed down by Keith.

He can’t help yelping.  

“If I fuck you will you finally shut up?”

Lance doesn’t get to answer because Keith’s hands are wandering again. They slip down his back, grab his ass for a moment, then move to his crack, hesitate for second, and then finally hit gold.

Lance tenses momentarily before forcing himself to relax. Everything he had read said that he needed to relax. He even took a CBD gummy before coming here.

“Wow,” Keith says, pushing a finger inside Lance’s body.

“What?” Lance responds, feeling paranoid momentarily that there is something wrong with his precious assets.

“You weren’t kidding. You’re so loose…”

Lance smirks. “I don’t half ass anything m…” he is cut off by the sensation of Keith digging deeper and one finger becoming two.

“You really did prepare yourself so well for me. Such a good boy,” Keith says, more to himself than anyone else.  

Lance squirms, not out of discomfort, but at the sudden realization of how intimate this is. Keith is literally where no one has ever touched except Lance himself. His face looms extremely close to Lance’s, eyes dark with lust, bangs falling across his face.  

“Not face to face,” he blurts out. He is not taking Keith’s dick while gazing into his eyes. Nope. Not gonna happen.

Keith frowns and then shrugs. “Fine then, not face to face.”

With surprising strength, he flips Lance over onto his stomach.

“Hands and knees,” he barks. Lance does it, shivering, feeling very silly for a moment while listening to Keith fumble beside his bed.

Then he hears a cap opening.

“I already…”

“You can never have enough lube. Trust me.”

Then the fingers return, this time more savagely.

“Ok…ok…I’m ready,” Lance squeaks.

“You can never have enough prep either,” Keith murmurs.  

It isn’t long though before the fingers disappear. There is rustling, which Lance assumes is Keith taking off his pants. Then he feels _Keith_ , as in Keith’s dick, sliding between his thighs. What Lance had deemed small before suddenly seems much bigger now that it’s about to be in his ass. Lance attempts to keep his breathing steady, bracing himself.  

It’s the calm before the storm, the last moments of Lance’s anal virginity.

Then, it happens.

Just a tender poke at first.

“Tell me if it hurts. I’m serious.” Keith’s voice is low and husky and barely recognizable.

Not that Lance can respond at the moment.

Reading about something and imagining it are very different from actually experiencing it. The reality of being penetrated feels very different than he imagined.

He inadvertently lets out a moan as Keith slides in. He waits for Keith to tease him, but it never comes. All he feels is Keith’s cock and his hands on his hips, keeping him flush with Keith’s hips.

There is immense pressure and feeling full, not in a bad way but not necessarily good either. Lance isn’t coming immediately like fanfics told him he would, but he does feel overwhelmed.

He giggles then.

“What?” Keith whispers.

“Oh my god, you’re inside me.”

Keith leans over him, dropping his head on Lance’s back. Lance can feel his smile before the real event starts.

The real fucking.

Keith thrusts into him quickly, nothing slow or gentle anymore.   

He can feel his breath on the back of his neck, a tickle of his long hair falling against his back.

There is a gentle ache followed by something not unpleasant followed by, eventually, a distant tingle of pleasure every thrust inward.

It’s doing it for him more than he thought it would. Lance could live with this.  

Furthermore, he can tell how much Keith is enjoying this. Sex has always been, at its core, a somewhat selfish activity for Lance. His main goal is getting off. Call him a selfish, immature teenager, but its true.

This is different though. This is pleasurable in a different way, the little tingle that goes down his back when Keith whispers fuck under his breath, how he can feel Keith tremble when he pushes his hips backwards into him.

It doesn’t take too long before Keith reaches around, grasping Lance’s hard cock and slowly finding a rhythm. It’s nice, the stimulation in the front and the back, the weird tingling inside with the more familiar pleasure outside.

Lance moans again. Keith leans forward at the sound, hips more erratic as he kisses Lance’s neck and shoulders.

“Come for me, Lance,” he whispers.

It’s Keith rasping out his name that does it. Lance comes, so caught up in his pleasure that he doesn’t even realize that Keith is doing the same. Then, he collapses on the bed with Keith on top of him.

Keith is still panting, hugging Lance in his arms. Then, he litters Lance’s back and shoulders with kisses, surprisingly tender as he cups Lance’s chin and turns his head. Then his lips are close, so close they might kiss. Keith’s eyes are mostly closed, a happy, dumb look on his face as he leans forward.

Lance jerks, pushing Keith away abruptly.

“Oooook, so…yeah, thanks? I better get going.”

Keith jerks back, looking at Lance like a wounded puppy dog.

“You’re leaving already?”

“Yeah, got some homework to do and stuff.”

“But…like, you don’t want to talk or?”

“Nah. Do you have something you want to talk about?”

Keith is quiet for a moment and then his face does the thing that Lance recognizes so well now. The closed off, “statue” Keith look. His poker face that hides his feelings from the world.

“Nope. See you in school later. Shut the door on your way out.” Then he stands, walking to the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Lance regrets it as soon as Keith's face falls and he leaves the warmth of the bed. He sits for a moment, debating whether he should go after Keith, but now its awkward. He grabs his clothes and walks of shame home, unsure if the night had been a success or not. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing Keith is kinda making me sad right now. that wanting emotional connection and conflating that with physical connection....oof.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow my twitter-i take reqs and ideas especially during summer  
>  <https://twitter.com/MidNigh29712110>


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